Recognition

It feels like a whole different lifetime ago when I started opening up and sharing our story. When I think back on everything that has happened in the last three years...I don't even recognize myself anymore. Who was that woman!? Looking back on her, I miss her courage, and I miss her strength. Gosh, she was ready to take on anything. And she did. She jumped feet first right into the stormy sea before her, and didn't even flinch as the waves swallowed her whole. And what a ride it has been...rumbling, tumbling, smashing, gasping for breath, hoping the waves that kept crashing would just spit me out and be done with me.

We've faced a sea full of storms.

We've struggled with our bruised and broken bodies. Infertility is a beast!

We began our adoption journey, and went searching high and low for our missing piece. And then we our missing piece!!! What a miracle she has been!

We've experienced (and still are!) everything that comes with parenthood and growing together as a family. And you know what...being a parent...it's hard stuff! Amazing, miraculous and wonderful...but still hard.

We've mourned (and still are!) the loss of the relationship we wish we could have with Loo's birth family. That is a space in my heart where I think it will always ache. As their story is not my story to tell, it will stay in my heart, and I won't share it here, but it will still ache nonetheless.

All of these storms we've braved...as hard as they were, I'm learning that I need to honor this time in our lives that we've gone through, and give it recognition, and pause to remember where we've been.

I think it's time to start looking forward now...because I am STILL her...even after everything.