Patchwork

We knew right off the bat that having children would be a tough path to go down. We knew that we were in for an adventure.  I don't think I was quite knew what this would do to my heart though...I read this quote this morning...and it struck me to my core.

"Making the decision to have a child is momentous. It is to decide forever to have your heart go walking around outside your body." -E. Stone 

I've realized that my heart is definitely walking outside of my body. Instead of safely tucked inside a cage of bones...it's running, racing, and tumbling FREE.

I think that cage cracked open when we first shared our decision to adopt. That...that was the beginning. Our hearts spilling out, we decided to open up for all to see. It has been an extremely humbling and vulnerable thing to depend on someone else to help us grow our family in this way.

The upsets and disappointments we've come across have chipped away at our hearts each time. And as we've learned the stories of some amazing expectant mothers...we've willingly left a piece of our hearts with each of them.  That is something I didn't quite expect...how much I would feel the holes that were left. Hearts are precious things after all...

But this running, racing and tumbling heart of mine...it's turning out just fine. Those battle-scars have been covered with a patchwork of love. The help, support and encouragement we've received along the way has helped our hearts grow in ways that I could have never imagined possible.

And loving others I've learned...doesn't leave holes in your heart...it just makes your heart bigger.