Repave

 It’s days like these, when I am grateful for the ambiguous language making up Justin Vernon’s lyrics. Some of my favorite moments with Jamie include her singing his songs with me and making up the words we know don’t belong on the lines. If you get the chance, you should check out the SNL skit where Justin Timberlake impersonates him as Bon Iver. You’ll get the gist.

His most recent project, Volcano Choir has been perhaps the most addictive thing that Jamie and I have listened to in a while. I was so happy when the vinyl finally came in the mail. We’ll let his vocals scratch and dip over the lovely instrumentals; let his words bounce around the walls of our home like impatient oxygen begging to be taken in. Every album we’ve heard of his has been crazy addictive.

The song “Comrade,” with its very catchy tune and lyrics, had me thinking about what has been the hardest part of all of this.

“Like I didn’t know it

Choking on the pulp of it

Semper Fi

You kept me on your long line

Tugging in the whole time…”

The ambiguousness allows me, thankfully, to get whatever I want from it. It could be about him and a girl just dragging him along. I chose to relate it to what has been the hardest part of this for me: being seemingly dragged along by birth parents who will likely never choose us. It’s tragic really, the hope they instill in us.

The album “Repave” has had me thinking a lot… Not just because of the music, but from the image on the cover…waves.

I feel like we’ve been stuck in some very treacherous waves. Waves meant to sink us and have us breaking out for air over and over. And as much as I hate it, and as dark and treacherous as the waves may be, they’re also…beautiful. There’s nothing beautiful about the ways that we struggle. But in the mysteriousness of all of this, I feel like something extraordinary is coming. That fact makes the waves beautiful. They can bounce and crash as hard as they would like. I know it will be worth it.